Some of you know that my sweet thang baby dady recently became a United States citizen. We partied. We cheered. We are relieved. We are grateful. What most people don't know is how hard it is to become a US citizen, and how difficult and expensive this journey has been.
When I first met Stiv in Peru in 2008, after a few months of dating, and with marriage on the forefront of our minds, we wanted to see how we could do in the US together, before making the big "forever" leap. However, Stiv couldn't simply hop on a plane and visit the USA. He had to have a visa to enter the country. The process entails me having to apply for the visa on his behalf, promising that he would not remain in the US as an illegal immigrant. This visa application included dozens of documents regarding my financial situation, my work situation, family life, housing, etc. I even included a hand-written letter from Washington State Senator Patty Murray (a friend of a friend) who petitioned for Stiv on our behalf. We submitted the application, along with $250 processing fee, and we waited. Eventually Stiv had an interview at the consulate in Lima, Peru. This is a 15 hour drive from his house (like going from Seattle to San Francisco) and it cost him about $100 just to get to the interview. Within 5 minutes of interviewing, he was denied the visa. Case closed. End of story.
We were disappointed, to say the least.
After researching our options, the only way to be together in the US was to get engaged. So, that we did. We rushed into this commitment way before being ready because we wanted to take the next step, which was seeing how to function as a couple in the new life we were anticipating in America. After a $600 filing fee for this new visa, called a "fiance visa", and lots of traveling back and forth (for interviews at the embassy) between Seattle and Lima (for me) and Chiclayo and Lima (for Stiv), he entered the USA in May of 2009. We had 90 days to get married or he would be deported and never allowed back into the country again. I wanted a small wedding. Our immigration attorney said NO WAY JOSE, you need a big wedding with lots of pictures if you want to convince the government that you really love each other and that it isn't a sham wedding. Apparently they really analyze your relationship and you need to prove you are in love. So we hurried with our wedding, got married on a Sunday afternoon before some friends and family. Most of my friends live out of town and couldn't manage to get to Seattle in time for our last-minute event. I felt dissonance in my heart the whole time because we were rushing and nothing felt authentic to us, it all felt like a show for the government. Which, in a sense, it was. We loved each other, and knew we wanted to get married, but it wasn't in this way. However, we had very little choice if we wanted to be together.
Fast forward 4 years. During that time Stiv got a permanent resident card, then an extended green card. There are always fees involved, and we spent another $800 or so on those. We also had to undergo scrutiny during several interviews in which they analyzed wedding photos, my engagement ring, love letters/emails we had written to each other, etc. Our whole relationship was on display for the US embassy to judge. They separated us and asked us the same questions, to see if our answers were the same. What did we do on our first date? When was our first kiss? How many siblings does he have? Where was his father born? This interrogation went on for a long time. I was very nervous.
Eventually, they believed us, that we were truly in love. Stiv became eligible to apply for citizenship in June 2013. He applied (another $600) on the day he became eligible and waited and waited to hear. Just two weeks ago he was notified that he would have an interview in which they ask him questions about the history of the United States. They asked him who the speaker of the house currently is. They asked him about the Bill of Rights, and what the purpose of the Constitutional Convention was. They asked him to list some of the people in the President's cabinet. They also asked him about our relationship--when he knew he was in love and how did he propose to me? He passed with flying colors (after all, he did study for hundreds of hours!) and the Oath ceremony was held the same day. During the ceremony, Stiv had to renounce all allegiance to Peru. He had to promise to take up arms for the USA if this were ever asked of him.
So what is the benefit of being a citizen?
Well, the reason we have pursued this is because there are many benefits offered to citizens that are invaluable. Though I've traveled extensively in my life, we want to travel to Europe, Asia, Africa, etc as a family. With only a Peruvian passport Stiv couldn't really go anywhere outside of South America. His dream is to go to Israel (he is part-Jewish), and he couldn't even dream of doing that as a Peruvian citizen. We also will have better luck soliciting for his family to come join us, some day, in the United States. Plus, he can vote in local and federal elections.
The lesson of all this, if there is one, is that I am grateful that I was born in the United States and was granted all the rights that come with that. Becoming a US citizen is a very difficult goal to achieve and is discouraged through our immigration policies. They tried to slow us down at every turn. The message we received loud and clear, over and over again, was that Stiv was not really welcome in the US and that this was a burden for our country. And being so, I would have to do all the work, and pay a lot of money, if we wanted to have a fighting chance. It definitely isn't for the faint of heart, nor for the poor. Regardless, I am grateful for the hand extended to us and am glad we survived. Welcome to America babe--you earned everything you got!
